Monday, March 23, 2009

Being prepared...ha!

I was in labor for 21 hours. I went in for my regular weekly check up on a Thursday and didn't exit until Sunday afternoon. It was 21 hours of looooong grueling labor. No pain meds. I did ask for a gun at some point which of course they didn't give me and repeatedly asked to please, please, please go home. My labor was induced because at my appointment that afternoon Phoenix's heart rate dropped for about 4 seconds, but because I was a week from my due date my OB decided to induce me anyhow. What I found out later was she was worried about me going home and something happening over the weekend. Just that week she had another preggers lady and her baby with a slow heart rate and that baby died :-( so she was airing on the side of caution.....Moving right along. So because I was not planning on having a baby that day (or rather the next day) I wasn't completely ready. I had laundry in the middle of my living room and I still didn't have everything I needed. That day we even skipped lunch because we were running late and made plans to eat at Panera after my appointment. So I go in expecting to leave right out and of course that didn't happen. They wheeled me up to L&D and laid in the bed in the triage room while they monitored me and kept repeating Shawn "I'm not ready, I'm not ready, this can't be happening now"I thought of all the things that still need to be done, how I hadn't re-read key parts in my Bradley Method book or Womanly Art of Breastfeeding.
I just simply wasn't ready. I cried and cried and begged the Lord to just keep him in for one more week. And then before I knew it they were wheeling me to my room.

Flash forward he's 4 months old and my mom is saying "Al this baby is so ready for some food" What? I wasn't ready for that either! I hadn't done enough research on making my own baby food. I thought I had until 6 months to start that...nope, not when your 4 month old is trying to eat every thing he sees and I don't just mean the remote. He knew the difference between OJ and a cell phone. The difference between a cheeseburger and teething ring. And he knew the OJ and cheeseburger would give him pure eating bliss. So I gave in and we started solids. But I wasn't all together prepared...but it worked and he loves them.

I guess the point I'm trying to get at is in my 7.5 month journey as a mommy I often feel ill prepared for everything that is happening. But I guess no real amount of planning could prepare you for this. I read tons of things on labor and delivery and nothing prepared me for the challenge that was ahead of me. No amount of message board mommy help, books articles or baby center bulletins can set your mind at ease.

Wow....that was a whole post of rambling nothings wasn't it?

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