Finzilla

Poor little Phoenix woke up this morning like he was a causality on The Bad Girls Club.
This morning at about 6:30 AM Charlotte starts barking like a maniac and I just roll over and ignore her. Then Phoenix starts wailing and luckily Shawn gets up to check on him. He never comes back in tells me what's up but it was pretty rough and gross morning with the dog and when he does come back he says "Phoenix scratched his eye". Groggily I kiss the little Finster and we cuddle for a few more hours. It wasn't until after my mom called and woke me up that I realized the extent of his eye "scratching" it was more like someone whacked him in his eye!

Shawn was just saying the night before that he was a baby Godzilla. Hence his new nickname Finzilla. He just goes around and terrorizes things. Now that he can pull himself up on everything he pulls himself up to the TV and just bangs on it. He crawls around growling and screeching at his toy monkey's. He is truly the definition of a boy. I can't wait to see him walking with his long curly hair in his punk rocker baby tee's! He's going to be scrumptious! Oh and did I mention he has two little teeth now? Another weapon to attack me with! And he's also being saying Dada for the last week so he crawls around all day saying "Dada, Dada, Dada! " And when I say crawls. I mean full crawls. Not those little things scootching across the floor. But up on all 4 move arms and legs crawling EVERYWHERE!

Christmas morning every day

Being a mommy for me is like Christmas morning (sometimes it's like ground hog day, but that's another topic for another day). When I was a just wee little girl I always looked forward to Christmas morning. My family was pretty lucky that no matter what we always got what we asked for and usually a lot more. Well with the exception of that one time that I didn't get that Enrique Iglesias CD. Christmas morning always held such promise. I would wake up each year at the knowledge of knowing something awesome was waiting for me to discover it under the tree. And when Christmas day was over I went to bed equally as excited as the night before, because I knew the next morning there would be more details to discover with my new gifts.

So how is this like motherhood (for me) ? Well ever since Phoenix has been born as sleep deprived as I am and as much house or work things I have to do that day I always wake up in a good mood. I wake up earlier then I like, but yet I have this huge smile on my face because I know Phoenix is waiting for me. Everyday with having a baby brings something new. The first time they laugh or smile. The first time they even poop up the back (and can you believe we've been lucky to only have maybe 10 of those his whole life! He poops a lot during the day, but it's not these huge poop explosions!). The first time he taste juice or a french fry. It's all so exciting because each new thing grounds him more to this world making it feel realer each day. Make sense? Some times I even have to stop myself from waking him up just to see him.

Welcome Back

I know I've been completely MIA lately. Phoenix has been literally allllllll over the place! Crawling, pulling himself, up, squealing, teething, laughing! Every time I think I have a few free minutes to blog I look down and there he is pulling Charlotte's ear or trying to go up the stairs!

We had our GI appointment this week and it didn't bring us any closer to a theory on why he's small. All the nurse practitioner did was give us a prescription for Prevacid. And told us to start doing 5 scoops of formula and 8 oz of water. Well thanks Nurse Practitioner Lindsay because all that has done is made him throw up. She also suggested we feed him more often. To which I replied "If I feed him anymore, I would never get to pee" I still feed this little kid as often as he wants, which is pretty much all the time! We left feeling really annoyed. They want us to come back in a month for blood work, but honestly I don't want to. It's called MommyTution. And I don't feel there is anything wrong with my baby. Shawn and I laid hands on him last night and we are going to leave it in God's hand. He's happy, thriving, mobile. He's fine!!!!

Well I think I'm coming down with something. My whole body aches, my throat is scratchy and I'm so tired I don't even want to stay up and watch my shows (which is HUGE for me!) So until next time. I'll get around to posting some new pictures of Phoenix soon.

First juice!

We have a juice drinker! We tried juice today after lunch (note the squash and banana stained face and bib) and it was a semi-hit! He only drank about 2 1/2 ounces though, but he seemed to like it.

Failure to thrive

Today was one of those days. I'm not a morning person at all so sometimes the slightest things can make my day just go downhill. So bad start to a morning, messy bedroom, barking dog, laundry to the ceiling. Then my afternoon is high jacked by the overwhelming need to hit the people I work with in the head with a book! UGH! So I'm plodding my way through my day and my mom texts me to remind me to set up Phoenix's appointment with the GI specialist (Thanks mom because I would have totally forgotten!) I call and I'm on hold for about 20 minutes and I get on the phone set my appointment up and then the receptionist says that his appointment is with the nurse practitioner who specializes in failure to thrive...and BAM! There it was, smack in my face. Is Phoenix really failing to thrive? I wanted to list all of his accomplishments and milestones he's met, he even started talking and doing his little screech while I was on the phone and I kind of hoped she would have heard him and said "Wow! He sounds pretty good". I would think a baby failing to thrive would not be as vocal as he is.....But she didn't say that. So for the rest of the afternoon I Google (dontcha love Google?) FTT and start getting really discouraged.

Since he's been born, obviously I've known he hasn't been gaining weight at the pace he should be, but then I'm comforted hearing from Shawn's mom that he was like this as a baby, and from my mom that he is defiantly thriving and even from the doctor. But then you hear the receptionist say "Failure to Thrive" or the other moms at Gymboree and church and the doctors office "Oh wow, he's sooo tiny" and I just smile and say "Yeah he is, but he's long. See!?" What I really want to say is "Well lady, your baby looks like she's 2 and she's 13 weeks/6 months/9 months old!"

Honestly though, I'm scared. I'm scared that all those irrational fears that I used to wake Shawn with in the middle of the night when I was pregnant are coming true. Does he have his leg muscles? Could he be albino? What is the cyst doesn't go away? What if all the TV I watched while he was in utero (another favorite word of mine) affects him? Could that be why he's not gaining weight? It's crazy and paranoid but he's my baby and I worry and I want the best for him. I'm scared that we should have listened to his first pediatrician and not breastfeed and that maybe we should have had test done way back when and maybe caught this problem sooner.

And now all I want to do is curl up in bed until his appointment (March 2nd) and pretend like this couldn't be a reality. But I can't I'm a mom, I have to be a grown-up (gosh darn it! Mommmmmmy!!!) I have 150,000 loads of laundry to fold and put away and files to call on. So I'll do what I know will always work. I'll put it in God's hands. He's much bigger then me anyhow and I know he'll handle it better then I will.

Gymboree Class

Last Wednesday Phoenix and I finally went to our first Gymboree class. I've been plotting on taking him for months now and we were supposed to go to our first class the day we had to take him to the hospital, but of course that didn't happen. So we went this week and I have to admit I was slightly disappointed because there was only one other baby in his class and she was 13 weeks. But the class was defiantly below his level. I was supposed to try and get him to watch the toy above his head but he just kept grabbing at it and flipping over and scooting all over the mat! The teacher and I both agreed he was ready for level 2! His favorite part (and mine too) was the bubbles and the parachute spinning above his head. So not this week-because we have a playgroup tomorrow (fingers crossed I can make this one. every time I RSVP for one something comes up and I can't go) the same day but the week after that we'll go. I'm also entertaining signing him up for music class. Already we can tell music is in his future (we hope) He loves being with Shawn in his studio and pushing buttons and banging on the keyboard.

Little Update

Gosh! I feel like I haven't posted in ages. Surprisingly I haven't had much to blog about. I had a topic I thought of today and now it's escaping me. So we'll just do a quick update for now...

So we have the dog, that we have now named Charlotte instead of Kaiser. Shawn says to me a few nights ago that she looks like a Charlotte so now she's Charlotte. I know it's awful we've been calling this poor dog Kaiser for almost a week and now we've branded her someone else. Ya know we did the same thing with Phoenix. At like 6 months we had his name and was already to go. He was going to be Phoenix Alexander Scott then 2 weeks after he was born we decided to change it to Phoenix Alexander Troy. Poor kid!

Phoenix had his 6 month check up Friday and the doctor referred us to a GI specialist. Phoenix has always had trouble gaining weight and ever since we've been counting every single little ounce he gains as major victory. Prior to him getting sick he was up to almost 14 pounds! Then he got sick and at his doctor's visit he weighed in at 12.14 and 26 inches long. Because of this she decided to hold off on his shots until he gets back to a little over 13. She always wanted him to see a GI specialist to rule out anything. In my heart (and the doctor echoed me, which made me relieved) I don't feel anything is wrong with him. I believe it's simple his genetics. But it can still be scary and make you worry. I nurse him still just about every two hours and we do solid food's 3 times a day, and we do 16 ounces of formula in the evening. He get's everything besides steak! And you should see this kid he moves and scoots everywhere! All the calories he takes in gets burned up because he's so active. He also is on target for all of his developmental milestones. He's active and alert which he has been literally since minute 1! They put him on my chest and opened his wide and looked around and has never shut them! It will be good though to get everything checked out.

Phoenix started cutting a tooth this week. And so far the teething phase hasn't been that bad. Sunday he was fussier then usual but we'll survive!